We were gong to a wedding reception in San Francisco. I had been looking forward to it for weeks. We stopped by Atria on the way out of town to drop off a new telephone. Her telephone has stopped working. From the minute we walked in the door, I knew, with a sinking heart, that I would not be going to the party. She was in great pain.
She was practically in tears. She also wasn't dressed
and I got her to put on her slacks, since Walt was walking around. She
was so incredibly pathetic, I would have lived with great guilt if I left
her there and went off to party, so I sent Walt to the party (so he could
deliver my card) and I told him that he could pick me up on the way home.
(I figured I could at least watch the Emmys live, but then
discovered her TV is not working. I have put in a work order to fix
it, but that won't be until next week.)
I gave her a couple of Aleve, but I know that doesn't do
anything for her pain, and I fixed a cold compress, but she didn't want to
wear it because it was ... well... cold. Her doctor had sent me a
message on Friday. She was going to try Norco for her but her
note said "sorry read message late was very busy to see
patient, so can not send Norco prescription " I don't know if this
means she has decided not to give her a pain medication or if she means that
she was too busy to help with her pain on Friday and she would have to wait
until Monday. (English is not her first language and she doesn't
communicate well at ALL in writing.) I sat down and wrote to my
gynecologist to ask for suggestions of someone who is a good gerontologist
that I could switch my mother to. She's going to refer me to someone
who can help me make that decision.
She took a nap for an hour or so and I
read but then she was awake again and pacing and trying to find a way to
help her pain.
The afternoon was horrible. She
fainted once, and was extremely restless, moving from chair to couch,
sitting on one butt cheek, then another, crying out in pain and wailing
"What can I do? It hurts so much!" I asked her
again about the cold compress and she got that "I'm not interested" look and
told me to "leave it in the refrigerator and if she thought she would need
it, she'd get it." She also has a new trick...when you suggest she do
something to help herself, she tells you how pretty you look, or how nice
your shoes are...anything to shift the topic of conversation.
Her Atria helper came to take her to dinner but she could
barely walk across the room, so we decided on a carry-in dinner. I
never got anything, but I did find out that the fainting episode that sent
her to the ER happened in the dining room. She has her EEG on
Thursday.
When the pain was at its worst I asked
her again to try the cold compress. She reluctantly agreed and I
handed it to her and told her to put it where it hurts. "Where?" she
asked. "On your BODY," I replied. This is what she did.
I told her it was supposed to go on her hip, where the pain
was. She put it there but got up every minute or so to walk around and
told me she couldn't use it because it was cold and uncomfortable.
She had moved to the couch and I was telling her she was
going to the doctor on Thursday for her EEG. "Why?" she asked. I
said "To see if they can figure out why you are passing out," and I also
said she would have lab tests and an x-ray to see if they could find
anything that would help them treat her pain.
"Pain?" she asked. "What pain?" I said "aren't
you in pain right now?" and she looked at me like I was stupid an said no,
testing her arms, reaching over to feel her legs. No pain. Five
minutes later she was writhing in pain again This is why it is almost
impossible to get a doctor to listen to me! The girl who was going to
take her to dinner asked how she was and she straightened up, smiled broadly
and aid "Oh, I'm just fine!"
By this time it was 7:30 and I expected Walt to arrive
sometime after 8. I had answered every usual question at least 20
times, with one new one added. I had given her a pair of slacks she
didn't recognize and had to tell her over an over again that she bought them
at Hodge Podge several years ago and I had found them in her closet.
She said she'd never seen them before (I fully expect them to be thrown out
when she takes them off)
She noticed the new phone several times and is NOT happy
with it. It will have to be moved, she says, because the telephone
doesn't go there, there has never been a phone there (though we removed a
phone from that very spot when we put the new one in)
Anyway, she was starting to get sleepy and if I stayed
another hour, I was going to go stark raving mad, so I kissed her, told her
to go to bed and left.
Half an hour after I got to the lobby I got a call from Walt
saying he was stuck in traffic and it would be another hour before he got to
Davis.
Thank goodness for my Kindle.
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