This is one I chose not to write in Funny the World because I suspect people are tired of hearing me talk about my mother, but yesterday was our 50th anniversary and there was a small party here. Jeri and Phil flew out from Boston for it.
Despite it being on her calendar and my talking to her about it every day for the past two weeks, she did not remember, of course. But I didn't expect her to. When Ned and Phil picked her up and brought her to the house, she was surprised to find out there was a party going on and said she was angry that she never knew anything about it.
She must have asked me the name of our dog Polly a dozen times or more, plus asking if it was our dog or not. My friend Char wrote, "I admire your patience with your mother. I think I might have ripped my hair out and gone screaming from the room after the hundredth time she asked you about Polly..." Sometimes it's nice to have someone else notice.
She would turn to me periodically through the afternoon and point to one of the grandkids and say "who is that little girl?" and then ask whose daughter she was and whether she had a sister. I lost count of how many times she did that.
She lost her way going from the kitchen to her seat at the table after picking up her piece of cake. It's a distance of, generously, 5 steps, but she started wandering around trying to figure out where to sit.
At the end of the day, she was very tired so I really understand why it was difficult for her to remember where she was or where she was going But we went over and over and over where I was going to sleep and where she was going to sleep. She didn't understand that this was my house and I was going to sleep here. She didn't remember ever being here before. She said she didn't know where her house was and wondered what city we were in.
Then there was the frenzy about her purse. She always has to bring a purse, though it is as useful to her as Queen Elizabeth's. But she was completely lost without her purse and wondered where it was She was reassured each time I told her I had it (out of the hands of the grandkids and teeth of their dog) and I would get it for her before she left. I sent Jeri and Phil to take her home so they could walk her back to her apartment, because I wasn't convinced she could find her way.
It was a lovely day and I'm thrilled to have been able to snap the above photo of her, since most of the time she was looking totally lost, but this was definitely not a good day for her, dementia-wise.
No comments:
Post a Comment